Know Thyself

When I think of my political outlook, I tend to see myself somewhere to the left-of-centre. Then again, some days it seems that the ‘centre’ of Australian politics lies somewhere between the Ku Klux Clan and the Exclusive Brethren, so being on the left may not mean as much as it used to.

Living in a country with a socially conservative government, I’m constantly bombarded with Governmental decisions I disagree with. At these times I cringe because I think that’s way too conservative. As a result, I have a healthy sense of how conservative I’m not.

But living in a country with a socially conservative government, I find it hard to get a sense of just how (small ‘l’) liberal I am. I know I’m not over there on the right trying to ban university education or demonise the coloured folk, but does that mean I’m a gay pinko commie? [that’s a rhetorical question, George – I know you’re aching to make the obvious comment. For the record, the answer is no.] Where are the moments in political life that allow me to work out where I draw the line to the left?

To find some answers, I devised a thought experiment: Imagine a hippy has just entered the room and espoused a social or economic policy that provokes you to respond, ‘that’s unfeasable and ill-conceived, you crazy hippy!’ What was the suggested policy?

Two answers came to mind quickly. The first, predictably, was the legalisation of marijuana. Being a left-leaning Adelaidian university student, I rarely come into contact with someone who isn’t a regular marijuana user. That’s cool. They tend to be very chilled, reasonable people, and they usually possess a ready supply of snacks. I have no problem with the decriminalisation of the use of the drug. At the same time, though, I think it would be a bad move to legalise the production and sale of weed.

A less obvious that’s way too liberal proposal would be a law making it illegal to discriminate based on attire. By this I mean that posh restaurants couldn’t refuse to serve people in tank tops and thongs; you could wear a footy jumper to the ballet. Perhaps you could go to a job interview nude and be assured of equal consideration, or walk into the Qantas Club in a loincloth hastily assembled from 97 of those moist refresher towlettes you receive on international flights.

I am not down with any of the above – that’s too liberal for me. On the face of it, insisting that people should dress for the occaision and in accordance with convention is an ideologically conservative viewpoint, but it’s a view I subscribe to. People discriminate based on other people’s dress every day, but there’s a reason we do it: it’s a shortcut that allows us to categorize the type of person we’re dealing with.

If I see a guy get out of a Commodore dressed in thongs and sporting a mullet, my brain tells me to stay away – this person is a bogan and is unlikely to share your interest in 1950s Science Fiction novels. It’s a reaction that arguably saves me considerable hassle, despite the fact that it may be unfair to mulleted, thonged Salisbury residents who also have a phD in English Liturature.

That's all by the by. The point I’m trying to make is that as a result of my thought experiment, I now know more about myself, which I see as a positive result.

I’m interested to know if you’ve ever had a that’s way too liberal moment. If not, try the thought experiment and let me know the results. My underlying assumption is that you, Gentle Reader, are also a lefty. If you’re a conservative, I’d LOVE to hear your viewpoint. In your case the thought experiment you should undertake reads thus:

Imagine a Halliburton executive (who is also a noted pro-life activist) has just entered the room. He espouses a social or economic policy that provokes you to respond, ‘wow. I’m a conservative myself, but isn’t that a bit too…evil?’ What was the suggested policy?